Have you ever seen a tantrum spiral out of control at the supermarket? Have you felt frustrated in a similar moment with your children? Being a parent involves an intense emotional journey — here's why. As people, we react to what happens around us. We take in information through what we hear, smell, see, taste, or touch. Our senses are always on alert to signal us when something isn't right. Think about how you'd feel walking down an empty street and hearing footsteps behind you getting closer and closer. Little by little, your senses and past experiences build a context for what you're experiencing. When those footsteps get closer and the person taps your shoulder, your heart rate has already sped up and your emotions start sending you messages about what's happening. In this situation, we have two options: run or fight. What would you do? Either one would be a normal reaction, driven by outside information that triggered physiological changes in your body and pushed you to act in some way. Emotions are reactions triggered in response to a stimulus, event, or situation, and they drive people to take action. There are as many emotions as there are colors we know. The most common are fear, joy, anger, surprise, sadness, and disgust. These are known as basic emotions, and they're expressed with the same facial expression around the world. One important thing is that emotions are fleeting — they last only a few seconds, and once you feel them, you can't avoid them. They act as messengers, since every emotion that arises is there to communicate something happening that deserves your attention. Understanding emotions isn't easy, especially when you're 3, 4, or 5 years old and your brain is still developing. Being able to control our emotions, and avoid the kind of situation described above, requires control over our actions, and that becomes possible once the brain's prefrontal cortex is fully developed — which doesn't happen until we're 25 or 30 years old! This may help you realize that your children need you and your mature prefrontal cortex to help them understand what they're feeling, name the emotion they're experiencing, understand what happens if they cross a line, and figure out how to solve a problem. When we talk about emotions as a family, it's always important for adults to first understand how to regulate their own feelings before turning to their children. That's why we're sharing a brief process you can use when a situation feels overwhelming: Stop! Whatever is happening, pause and focus on your breathing. Identify where you feel it. Let the emotion express itself and notice where in your body you're feeling it. Name it and receive the message. Name what you're feeling based on what you know or have experienced before, and figure out what message that emotion has for you given the situation you're going through. Transform it. If what you're feeling is heavy or unpleasant, try turning it into something more constructive for you and those around you. These four steps can help you manage heavy emotions you're feeling or that are bothering you. Remember that all emotions are valid — none are good or bad, some just feel pleasant and others unpleasant. So, how can we help our children regulate their emotions? It's actually not that complicated — you just need to pay attention to what you observe and what they're able to express about how they feel. Here are some recommendations: Help them name what they're feeling. How? When you notice they're struggling to finish a task, tell them it seems like they're feeling frustrated because they can't do it, and help them feel comfortable with that feeling. Be their role model. How? If you yell or give them the silent treatment when you're angry, they'll learn that's how anger should be expressed. When you feel that way, tell them you're not reacting well and that you're going to take a moment to calm down. Talk naturally with them. How? Set aside the usual questions you ask when they get home from school or an activity. Instead, find a calm moment and talk in a simple, close, natural way. While you listen, try to recognize emotions through their expressions and body language. Validate their emotions. How? Let them know you're listening and that what they feel is okay — this helps them understand that their emotions matter and are respected. Set boundaries. How? This means validating how they feel, but not necessarily what they do with that feeling, especially if it affects others or themselves. For example, if you notice they hit when they're angry, you should validate that the emotion is anger caused by a situation, while making clear that this isn't a reason to be aggressive, and help them find a way to calm the anger. Play a game naming other people's emotions. How? Try to figure out, through stories or movies, what characters are feeling in different situations — this helps children realize that everyone feels emotions all the time. Stay calm. How? Practice a few minutes of simple breathing techniques or a quiet moment where you can sit in silence and peace. Emotions are ever-changing, and sometimes they don't come one at a time — that's when that whirlwind of feelings can become overwhelming. Remember that all emotions are necessary for life. If you feel you need professional support, seek it out as an act of love and responsibility toward yourself and your family. With us, your children learn in an environment of trust where they can express their emotions naturally, building their self-esteem, which supports their well-rounded development and helps them navigate life as adults in the best possible way. Download the guide: https://dev.elyxirdigital.com/cbnh/wp-content/uploads/2025/09/NH-Habilidades-emocionales-gestion-emocional.pdf
